程式設計語錄

圖片來源: wikipedia

(選自 DevTopics 整理的語錄)
(用來讓自己看起有學問的)

• "Simplicity, carried to the extreme, becomes elegance."  簡單到極致即為優雅。
  – Jon Franklin
• "The best way to predict the future is to implement it."  預測未來的最佳方式就是實做它。
  – David Heinemeier Hansson
• "Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler."   儘量讓事情簡化，但別太簡化。
  – Albert Einstein
• "The difference between theory and practice is that in theory, there is no difference between theory and practice."  理論和實務的差別在於，理論上，理論和實務沒有分別。
  – Richard Moore
• "The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge."  知識的的敵人不是無知，而是知識的假象。
  – Stephen Hawking
• "密碼就像內褲一樣： 不要讓別人看到，要常常更換，而且，別和陌生人共用."
  – Chris Pirillo
• "Computers are like bikinis. They save people a lot of guesswork." 電腦就像比基尼，幫我們省下許多猜測的麻煩。
  (Sam Ewing)
• "Come to think of it, there are already a million monkeys on a million typewriters, and Usenet is nothing like Shakespeare."  其實想想，現在已經有上百萬隻猴子坐在上百萬台打字機前了，但網路論壇一點也不像莎士比亞。(現在可用來描寫部落格)
  (Blair Houghton)
• "Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked." 
  (Jeff Pesis)
• "Web Services are like teenage sex. Everyone is talking about doing it, and those who are actually doing it are doing it badly." (網路服務) 
  – Michelle Bustamante
• "The best way to get accurate information on Usenet is to post something wrong and wait for corrections."
  – Matthew Austern

程式師的幽默

• 問：為什麼程式設計師是分不清萬聖節和聖誕節？
  答：因為 Oct 31 = Dec 25.
• 一個男人在吸煙，他的女朋友很生氣的說："Can't you see the warning on the cigarette pack? Smoking is hazardous to your health!" 男人回答說： "I am a programmer. We don't worry about warnings; we only worry about errors."
  
• "I think Microsoft named .Net so it wouldn't show up in a Unix directory listing."
  (Oktal)
• "C++ : Where friends have access to your private members."
  (Gavin Russell Baker)
• "Computers are getting smarter all the time. Scientists tell us that soon they will be able to talk to us. (And by 'they', I mean 'computers'. I doubt scientists will ever be able to talk to us.)"
  (Dave Barry)
• "I've noticed lately that the paranoid fear of computers becoming intelligent and taking over the world has almost entirely disappeared from the common culture. Near as I can tell, this coincides with the release of MS-DOS."
  (Larry DeLuca)
• "It was a joke, okay? If we thought it would actually be used, we wouldn't have written it!"
  – Mark Andreesen, 談 HTML 的 BLINK 標籤

程式師與使用者

• The three most dangerous things in the world are a programmer with a soldering iron, a hardware engineer with a software patch, and a user with an idea. - The Wizardry Compiled by Rick Cook
• "If you think your users are idiots, only idiots will use it."
  – Linus Torvalds
• "From a programmer's point of view, the user is a peripheral that types when you issue a read request."
  – P. Williams
• "Computers are good at following instructions, but not at reading your mind."
  – Donald Knuth
• "There is only one problem with common sense; it's not very common."
  – Milt Bryce
• "Your most unhappy customers are your greatest source of learning."
  – Bill Gates
• "There are only two industries that refer to their customers as 'users'."(販毒業與軟體業)
  (Edward Tufte)
• 
  "Any fool can use a computer. Many do."
  (Ted Nelson)
• "That's the thing about people who think they hate computers. What they really hate is lousy programmers."
  (Larry Niven)
• "Just remember: you're not a 'dummy,' no matter what those computer books claim. The real dummies are the people who–though technically expert–couldn't design hardware and software that's usable by normal consumers if their lives depended upon it."
  (Walter Mossberg)
• "Software suppliers are trying to make their software packages more 'user-friendly'… Their best approach so far has been to take all the old brochures and stamp the words 'user-friendly' on the cover."
  (Bill Gates)
• "There's an old story about the person who wished his computer were as easy to use as his telephone. That wish has come true, since I no longer know how to use my telephone."
  (Bjarne Stroustrup)

程式設計

• (程式註解)"Commenting your code is like cleaning your bathroom — you never want to do it, but it really does create a more pleasant experience for you and your guests."
  – Ryan Campbell
• "Low-level programming is good for the programmer's soul."
  – John Carmack
• "A program is never less than 90% complete, and never more than 95% complete."
  – Terry Baker
• "Manually managing blocks of memory in C is like juggling bars of soap in a prison shower: It's all fun and games until you forget about one of them."
  – anonymous Usenet use"
• "Standards are always out of date. That's what makes them standards."
  – Alan Bennett
• "There's no obfuscated Perl contest because it's pointless."
  – Jeff Polk
• "Some people, when confronted with a problem, think 'I know, I'll use regular expressions.' Now they have two problems."
  – Jamie Zawinski
• "You can't have great software without a great team, and most software teams behave like dysfunctional families."
  (Jim McCarthy)
• "There are only two kinds of programming languages: those people always bitch about and those nobody uses."
  (Bjarne Stroustrup)